


Worth

by Allenaki



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2019-02-09 23:42:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12899382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allenaki/pseuds/Allenaki
Summary: Saeran knows he doesn’t deserve a single drop of happiness. He has committed unforgivable crimes in the past, after all. He is a monster, nothing more, nothing less. Yet, MC and his brother insist on blessing him with presents he shouldn’t receive.





	Worth

“Saeran…? Are you alright? “

No answer. For the last few days, Saeran has been spending most of his time in his bedroom, barely eating or talking. Usually, he would at least answer his brother’s questions, but recently, he would practically always ignore his twin’s plea. Saeyoung was incredibly worried. He thought his brother was recovering, that he had managed to make him feel more at peace in their new home, far from their abusive mother and the cult that had manipulated him for years. Saeyoung had done everything in his power to make his twin happy. He gave him the fluffiest clothes, the warmest blankets, he made the most comfortable bedroom he could create with the help of MC, heck, their freezer even was full of different ice cream flavors! For his brother’s sake, he bought all the different ice creams he could find, from typical flavors, like chocolate, to the most unusual, like fish. So… why? Why couldn’t he bring a smile to his brother’s lips, even with his perkiest jokes? As a last resort, he had called you over: maybe the thoughts troubling Saeran just couldn’t be shared with him, maybe he would feel better if he could talk with someone else? 

Although you doubted Saeran could ever prefer your company to Saeyoung’s, you agreed to helping him, which had led to you waiting for more than fifteen minutes in front of the younger twin’s bedroom.

“Saeran… I just want to know what’s bothering you. Saeyoung is worried sick, could you please let me in?”

Still no answer. You had waited long enough. If he wasn’t going to open the door after fifteen minutes, it was very unlikely he ever was going to let you see him. Lockpicking was a hobby that would get you a lot of surprised looks, but it came in handy sometimes.

“I’m coming in. I’ll just stay for a few minutes, so don’t worry.”

Opening the door, you were met with a pair of mint expressionless eyes. Saeran didn’t even react to you entering the room, he just seemed… completely empty, like a corpse all life would have left a long, long time ago. You sat on his bed, next to him, close enough to let him feel your warmth, but far enough so he wouldn’t feel trapped. Then, you lightly, and carefully touched his hand to make sure he noticed your presence.

“Go away.”  
“I’ll leave when you tell me wh—“  
“Just fuck off.” He spited.  
“I won’t. I’ll wait as long as I have to, so talk to me, alright?”  
“You won’t understand anyway! People like you and my dumb brother won’t ever understand what trash like me feel!”  
“You… You’re not trash at all, what makes you think it can be the case?”  
“You must be incredibly dumb if you don’t know what I mean.”

You couldn’t deny his words hurt, but you knew that he had to handle more pain than you could imagine. Saeran must have thought he would scare you away by screaming, but that wasn’t the case. All you could see in front of you was an incredibly hurt, scarred boy. Maintaining your composure, you softly asked him to answer you anyways.

“I could hurt you. I could break your bones right now, Saeyoung’s too far to save you. So leave already, for god’s sake.”

You gently caressed his cheek as to make you point.

“I’m not scared at all. No matter how harsh you sound, I’ll always know that in truth, you are kind-hearted.”

“Kind-hearted? Don’t make me laugh. When I sent you to the apartment, I intended to use you, like a tool. I intended to use you to drug many different people in one go.”

You noticed water drops started clouding his eyes. You carefully wiped his tears with your sleeve and gave him a gentle, reassuring smile.

“I don’t resent you in any way, I never have. It’s thanks to you, it’s because you chose me that I met so many wonderful people who give me happiness every day, including you, Saeran. Ever since I met the RFA, there isn’t a single night I fall asleep without a smile. I’ve never had a chance to thank you for that, so I am glad I could today.”

You wondered if you managed to convey your feelings properly to him. You felt like you might have been a glimmer of hope in his eyes, but this sparkle disappeared in a fraction of seconds. Of course, you had never expected him to heal in a single conversation, but you wouldn’t mind repeating comforting words for years if only he would make him feel slightly better, if only it would lead him to opening his heart a millimeter more.

“I shot a man.”

“The sins we committed… We have to live with them forever. However, please remember that you are, and were already a victim under the influence of heavy drugs. You know… No matter how bad one’s acts are, I don’t think that a person can be entirely evil. People say I am unrealistically optimistic, but… I don’t think…”

You were struggling to find the right words, the words that could reassure him, even if it were just a little bit, the words that could allow him to sleep tonight without being overwhelmed by his anxiety and insecurities, the words that would allow him to live for a few minutes without thinking that he is a monster who should just die. Nevertheless, you dearly that one day, you would be able to offer him some assistance despite how much of a bad speaker you were.

“…I don’t think… the crimes you committed as a victim define you. Please remember that even if the whole world would turn its back to you, I would still believe you are kind-hearted.”

“I’m not… I really am worthless trash. A monster no one would ever want, a monster that even I wouldn’t want. I... tried to kill Saeyoung. There is no way I could ever be forgiven for that!” 

“Saeran…”

You gingerly wrapped your arms around him. Against your expectations, the man didn’t push you away. Instead, he let his head rest on your shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably.

“You know, for Saeyoung, you don’t have to do anything for him to need you. No matter what you have done or what you will do, Saeyoung will always think of you as his most precious person. To him, you are irreplaceable. There is no way on Earth he would ever think of you as worthless. If you lifted your eyes away from the floor, you would realize he is happiest when he spends time with you.”

“I… There is no way, because… My hands were on his neck…”

To convince him, you would need more than words. For the first time, you were grateful the RFA messenger automatically saved calls sent using the app. In truth, you would have never imagined anyone would ever use this feature.

“Let me show you something very special. Don’t tell Saeyoung, though, he will probably pout if he realized I let you listen to it.”

Taking your phone out of your pocket, you pressed a few keys and searched for a phone call you had with the older twin a very long time ago. A few seconds later, his voice echoed in the room.

“When I was young, I used to laugh whenever I had ice cream, no matter how hard I cried before that. By the way, when I was young, I used to eat this ice cream that you split in half… The one you can share with your friend, you know? That was my favorite”  
“Who did you share it with?”  
“A person most precious to me. A person I miss so much in the entire world…”

“See? Trust me… I know I’m not the brightest, but I can at least see how much you are loved. There is absolutely no way Saeyoung or I could ever think you are worthless, because you definitely aren’t. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, not even yourself. Promise me you won’t, okay?”

You softly smiled to encourage him. He timidly nodded. After wiping his tears away, you thought you should leave him alone for a while so he could sort out his feelings.

“Saeyoung is currently trying to make you crepes topped with ice cream to cheer you up. I should go help him before he burns down the entire house. Join us when you feel ready to, okay?”  
“Alright…”  
“MC?”  
“Yes?”

…”Thank you”. The words were so faint, so quiet that you thought, for a split second, that you might have imagined them.

“You’re very welcome.” After giving him a bright, heartening smile, you silently closed the bedroom door.


End file.
